Thursday, 28 July 2016

Rory O'Grady

This is the yucky and unpleasant story
Of a small and slimy child called Rory.
Rory O'Grady used to drive his Mum potty
Because he was just so incredibly snotty.

The stuff constantly dripped out the holes in his head
From first thing in the morning until time for his bed.
And it didn't stop then, it was all night-time too.
So he woke up each morning covered in goo.

He smothered his bedroom, he covered the hall.
With snot on the ceiling and all up the wall.
He plastered the living room with his green nasal jelly.
The sofa, the book shelves the cat and the telly.

Rory never minded his slimy green trail.
It helped him glide round like a little boy-snail.
And when dried out a little I'm sure that you know
You can squeeze it in shapes like a kind of play-dough.

Mum thought it would be good to get him out their home.
So he went to a nursery but he played on his own.
He couldn't make friends with the girls or the boys.
Nobody wanted him to slime on their toys.

So home Rory stayed and he played round the house.
Well behaved, kind and gentle, quiet as a mouse.
But his family couldn't cope with his nose that kept dripping.
They were fed up with the slime on which they kept slipping.

Mum baked some cakes that looked like a dream
Then Rory iced them with his special green cream.
please go away Rory! You've ruined the lot.
I'm really fed up with you and your snot!”

Dad was in his study typing on his computer.
Rory tried to see but sneezed a load out his hooter.
Just go away Rory! Before I lose the plot
I'm tired of you ruining things with all your horrid snot!”

His Sister was in her room doing art with lots of stickers.
Then Rory leant across her and drenched her to her knickers.
Buzz off Rory! Or I'll tie you in a knot.
I'm sick and tired of you and your stupid snot!”

His Brother was outside kicking his new football.
He slipped in a Rory trail causing him to fall.
Get out of here now Rory! You nasty yuck faced clot.
Everybody's really sick of you and your disgusting snot!”

Later that day Rory's family looked around.
They searched the whole house but he wasn't found.
For hours and hours they all went hunting on
Until they were really sure their baby boy had gone.

We love him and miss him” his family sadly cried.
That's what they said out loud at least, but what they knew inside
Was that they had been mean to him and really not very nice.
And now to have him back with them they would pay any price.

Grandfather arrived to see grandson Rory.
The family quickly told him the whole terrible story.
Rory's Granddad, like most, was no silly old fogey.
He knew that to find him you just follow the bogey.

They followed the greenie without waiting to wait
As the slippery trail led them all out the gate.
All of the family, Father and Mother,
Granddad and sister and Rory's big Brother.

The went through the park past fountain and rose
Following the product of their Son's runny nose.
We'll find him quite soon without any doubt”
Said Rory's poor Mother and then she called out:

Come back Rory O'Grady, we miss you a lot!
We're willing to put up with all of your snot!”

The family walked quickly past all the shops
Hot on the trail of Rory's sticky nose drops.
They ignored all the sellers and pushed through the crowd
While Rory's Dad shouted out loud:

Come back Rory O'Grady, we miss you a lot!
We're ready to overlook all of your snot!”

They walked down the river and right round the lake
Following Rory's snotty nose-snake.
We'll carry on” Said his Sister, “In sun, snow or cloud”
Then she took a deep breath and shouted out loud:

Come back Rory O'Grady, we miss you a lot!
We still want you! You AND your snot!”

Through a supermarket they went, past fruit and a freezer
Along what had come out of their Rory's sneezer.
How long would they search for? Nobody could tell.
Then Rory's Brother let out a huge yell:

Come back Rory O'Grady, we miss you a lot!
We all really love you! Especially your snot!

They found him asleep in a green sticky puddle.
They picked him right up and said with a cuddle.
We know it's not your fault that you drive us dotty
By being quite so incredibly snotty.”

They took him straight home and from that day to this
Were never put off from a hug and a kiss.
They coped with the snot with love and with laughter
So Rory O'Grady lived happily ever after.

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